The principal elements of hip-hop transposed to the British weblogging environment:
- Hydragenic is the best weblog.
- Hydragenic is the most authentic weblog.
- Hydragenic intends to steal your man/woman*. (*Delete as appropriate.)
- Hydragenic is
better writtenwritten bettercooler than all other weblogs. - Hydragenic has lots of money, drugs and jewellery.
- Hydragenic continues to exist out of respect for those who have gone before (big up to the Swish Cottage and the Mentally Positive).
- Hydragenic is from the streets (or at the very least, the pavement).
- In most cases Hydragenic is completely against violence; however, when violence is required, Hydragenic has the biggest gun.
- All webloggers should stop fighting amongst themselves and fight the oppressor instead.
- Hydragenic loves nothing more than to get onto the dancefloor and shake its extremities.
- Gosh, isn’t it enjoyable when we dance so closely together?
- Hydragenic is really, really great. Honestly.
And, er, Hydragenic has the biggest trainers in da hood?
Or something.
Er . . .
Heh, heh, excellent! I haven’t been Hg way enough lately…..
… and yeah, err Blog it out to ya!
Ah good, excellent to see a continuing misrepresentation of hip hop as a confused version of the modern pop-thug-rap phenomenon. First class.
Fair point, James. I have music by Roots Manuva (played only this morning, for what that’s worth), DJ Format with Abdominal, TTC, Hip Hop Hoodios and The Roots amongst my collection, so I’m aware that this post is indeed a misrepresentation of certain aspects of the genre.
I can’t agree entirely with you though. Missy Elliott describes her latest album as “hip-hop” and it demonstrates at least half of the attitudes that I (affectionately) parodied in this post.
Superb post – actually made me spit tea at my PC laughing